Archive for June, 2009

What’s in it for me?

June 22, 2009

Unconditional love means that we love, and thus seek the best for the other person, regardless of their response to us. We receive this kind of love all the time. God always bestows 

(photo courtesy of

His love on us unconditionally and His challenge to us in marriage is to love each other like He loves us. This kind of love focuses on meeting the needs of the other person. It is the greatest gift you can give your spouse. It is not based on their behavior, but on your desire to love them as Christ loved you.

In a healthy marriage, we will actually give unconditional love before we realize we’re receiving it. Far too many people are waiting for their spouse to make the first move. Someone has got to take the lead. Why not you?

Let me give you a suggestion. Say to your spouse, “I’ve been thinking about our marriage, and I realize that I have loved you conditionally. I think love should do better than that, and I want to make a fresh commitment to our marriage. I am going to ask you to give me one suggestion each week on what I can do to make your life better. Whatever you suggest, I’m going to do my best to do it.”

photo courtesy of: by joemess from austin source Wikimedia and

Still want to understand love better?  Read 1 Corinthians 13, slowly, carefully and out loud.

4 Days Left to Take the 5LL Quiz

June 16, 2009

Hello Bloggers,

If you haven’t heard, there are 4 days left to take the 5LL Quiz for a chance to win a Gary Chapman conference trip.

It only takes a couple minutes to test your knowledge of the five love languages! You could win the grand prize. Don’t miss this chance!

Please read the complete rules before taking the quiz.

Click here to take it now.

May Blog for Books Winner

June 12, 2009

Congratulations to Angela!  Our May Blog for Books winner!  Angela will be receiving a copy of the one that started it all, The Five Love Languages.  

Whose Money?

June 11, 2009

Remember when we were kids and our parents told us to share?  Why was that so hard?  Well if we thought it was hard to share our toys it’s even harder to share our money.  When you get married it’s time for a change in the mentality of, “Mine!”

When you get married, it is no longer, “your money” and “my money,” but rather “our money.” Likewise, it is no longer “my debts” and “your debts,” but rather “our debts.” When you accept each other as a partner, you accept each other’s liabilities as well as each other’s assets.

A full disclosure of assets and liabilities should be made before marriage. It’s not wrong to enter marriage with debts, but you ought to know what those debts are and agree on a plan for repayment.

Marriage is two becoming one. Applied to finances, this means that all our resources belong to both of us. One of us may be responsible for paying the bills and balancing the checkbook, but this should never be used as an excuse for hiding financial matters. Full and open discussions should precede any financial decision. Marriage is enhanced by agreement in financial matters.

If you’re the “bread-winner” of the family how do you maintain humility and remember that it’s not YOUR money?  If you have a lot of debt in your name, do you ever feel blamed by your spouse for that?  We can lift one another up if we remember that all we have belongs to the Lord anyway.

How do you work out finances in your home, and remember the “OUR” rule?


Money! An Asset or Liability?

June 5, 2009

Sometimes it seems as if the more we have, the more we argue about what we have. The poorest of couples in America have abundance compared to the masses of the world’s population. I am convinced that the problem does not lie in the amount of money that a couple possesses, but in their attitude toward money and the manner in which they handle it.

I think a lot of us have an idea in mind of what the perfect home, perfect car, perfect job that seems to be the benchmark of what would make us happy. We get there and then realize, “No, that not quite enough.” Author Jeanette Clift George has said, “The great tragedy in life is not in failing to get what you go after. The great tragedy in life is in getting it and finding out it wasn’t worth the trouble.”

When life focuses on getting more money, we have the wrong focus. Our marital relationship and our relationship with God are far more important than how much money we have. Getting our priorities straight is the first step in making money an asset to marriage rather than a liability.
What ways can money be a liability to your marriage? Discuss what you think it looks like when money is an asset to your marriage.